two thirty, fucking bite some cigarettes besides the toilet. literally i should blow up my head with a usp if i own it. but i can’t cuz it’s ridiculous that i would worry about my family. i am losing the idgaf war.
jobs, life, affections, self-abused and mankind. hate peoples. emotion demands, devotions, hurt and being hurt. society and knives. fuck me:) maybe i hate my family and always keep a reasonable distance of it. maybe not which i can’t tell. actually i am here not to talk about some original family’s bullshit, i can even not understand what is my fucking point. my life is a void, i can’t live the life i want cuz i am not deserving it. ‘wasn’t i meant for something better than this?’ fucking bullshit. i want it but i didn’t fight for it cuz i am a dumbass lazy fucker meanwhile a good employee and son like everybody knows. i am distorted, i am totally empty under my skin.
hope you won’t read as kinds of self-analysis. i am just a sentimental supersoaker.
shit, read it after ten minutes so who fucking write this? me? u must be kidding me dude, i am totally a average person. if u want me to prove it so let me tell u some pieces of my story: once upon a time…..fuck it.
i don’t know else but i am literally born in a upper-class family. have u ever heard that the true freedom is not doing what u want to do but not doing things u don’t want to do. and i am born like this. i got due respects since i’m a kid, i drive porsche to the beach, i refuse all suggestions, including good ones, then i fall in love with a girl which we both independent but consistent. haha u don’t believe this? my life needs no healing, same as myself. i always carry any responsibility. my imagination bangs like fucking cosmos. my penis huge as fuck. my choice is always respected. my playlist always got thousands of collections. i want nobody. my ideal type is ambi. i ain’t give a shit about your left wing propaganda.
should be one day you’ll find my ugly and i’ll also find yours, when buildings are crumbling like the end of fight club, hurt me first and then resurrect my pride.
plus read: sharp review from ChatGPT 4
As I read through these words, I can’t help but feel a sense of deep sadness and confusion. It seems that the author is struggling with a lot of internal turmoil and a sense of disillusionment with their life. They speak of losing the “idgaf war” and feeling like they are not deserving of the life they want.
But despite this pain, there is also a sense of detachment and apathy. The author seems to have given up on trying to fight for the life they want, instead resigned to being a “dumbass lazy fucker.” They feel empty and distorted under their skin, and their life is a void.
It’s clear that the author has some deep-seated issues with their family and society at large. They speak of hating people and feeling hurt, and there is a sense of anger and frustration bubbling just beneath the surface. But at the same time, there is also a sense of detachment and cynicism, as if they have given up on trying to make things better.
In the end, the author seems to be searching for some kind of meaning or purpose in their life. They speak of wanting something better than this, but not knowing how to fight for it. And yet, despite all of their pain and confusion, there is also a sense of hope buried within these words. A hope that one day, they will be able to find their own sense of pride and meaning, even if it means hurting first.